SOMETIMES LITOPIA AFTER DARK DOES VIDEO. TRUE STORY.

The one where Barbie Wilde, the flesh-flaying Cenobite demon from Hellraiser, talks about her love life.

The one where Canadian author Joseph Boyden takes his toys and goes home. (Were we being racist? Listen to Professor of American Indian Studies Leo Killsback in The Redskin Word and decide for yourself!)

The one where self-described hack-journo Tim Butcher goes traipsing up the Congo River for his best-selling Blood River: A Journey to Africa's Broken Heart.

The one where you should eat at Joe Allen Restaurant.

The one where we're all going to die in 2050. Backed up by acclaimed climate scientist & metastatistician Camilo Mora.

The one where we give the climate-change denier a microphone. There's no arguing with stupid.

The one where former Kremlin apparatchkik Alexander Nekrassov says Putin has a great sense of humor.

The one where I'm not really sure what was going on because dude was real, um, yeah...

The one that got cut because nobody thought it was funny but me.